Endless Days at Bottomless Lakes

Mr. Zee has a special relationship with our little tent trailer. He worries about getting it set up before the sun goes down, and then he forgets to observe Camping Rule #1: Drink something, anything, to help you remember that camping is fun. Do this before trying to set up the tent trailer. Then he loses all reason and does strange things resulting in breakage and is very, very crabby.

We all went down to Bottomless Lakes for a couple of days of relaxation—Mr. Zee, my sister Auntie Bucksnort, and me. The dogs came along, of course: Captain Emma Sparrow (aka Hem E. Roid), Leny (Big Dog), and Weetzie (Tiny Cujo). The dogs and Bucksnort and I were all observing the first Camping Rule while Mr. Zee fumed and sizzled and broke things off the trailer. It was not an auspicious beginning, but we had all forgiven each other by the next morning, especially once Auntie Bucksnort agreed to delete all the plumber’s crack photos from her little camera.

Our camp site was in a picturesque spot. We could see Lea Lake, there were red sandstone cliffs behind us, and we had a wonderful view of the storms moving over the distant mountains. What we also had, there at our little campsite, were flies. More flies than you could possibly imagine; flies without number. Flies crawling all over us, the dogs, our food. Flies throwing themselves into our drinks, even when we changed over to travel mugs with the tiniest of openings. Bucksnort ate three, which she reported were minty, but crunchy.

I can measure the enjoyment of the other campers by some of the encounters I had in the ladies' room.

#1
Me, to middle aged lady at sink: Good morning.
She, grabbing my arm: How do you people stand these flies? We can’t cook, we can’t eat. We can’t wait to leave! Gaaahhh!!!

#2
Me, to teen-aged girl at sink: Good morning.
She, leaning in and staring at her own image after only one night of roughing it: [Silence].

#3
Me, to little girl at sink: Good morning.
She, backing away from me, then turning and fleeing: Mommeeeeeee!!!
Me, looking in my own mirror to discover wild hair, black circles under eyes, twitching caused by flies landing on skin: Mommeeeeeee!!!

To be continued...